I woke up feeling rather good about the dawn of a new year; the usual clichéd New Year motivational speeches that fizzle out after the first week seemed to have left some sort of impression on me. By the time I arrived at work, I had already spent my morning beating my steering wheel in frustration. Unlike what the rampant quotes littering my news feed promised,  the new year has not brought about much changes, at least definitely not to Maltese driving! Here are a few annoying driving habits that should be eradicated in 2017.

Ifqa’ dak il-ħorn!

Homer simpson honking horn

I’m not quite sure what you expect to happen when you honk incessantly as you’re stuck in traffic. Do you expect the cars in front of you to sprout wings like a Red Bull advert? Do you think you live in the world of Harry Potter where a press of a button can lead to a flying Ford Anglia without raising any eyebrows? Stop living in delusion. Honking that blasted horn just makes everyone want to scream.

Indicator xi jkun?

someone swithching lane

Listen closely; I’m going to let you in on a secret. Look to the side of your steering wheel and you’ll see two protruding plastic rods . Push them down and you’ll hear a clicking sound and see a flashing light emanating from the back of your vehicle. Yes, you’ve found the indicator a.k.a. the thing you should use whenever you’re changing lanes or turning. Now use it.

Mhux malajr!

man eating chips in the car

No, buying a couple of pastizzi tal-irkotta (u qassata tal-piżelli għal imbagħad) does not merit haphazard parking in the middle of the road and blocking the whole lane.

Naqqas man, naqqas!

bang head against steering wheel

Yes, there’s a speed camera right after the tunnel. Yes, it’s essential that you keep to the driving limit (as you always should). No, there’s no need for you to decelerate until you crawl your way past that white, plastic structure.  You won’t be getting any brownie points for driving at a snail’s pace in an area where 80km/hr is the limit.

Thanks ħij!

giphy-3

If you’re on a give way and you edge out till you’re blocking my lane, you’re not giving me much choice. I either screech to an abrupt stop and let you pass, or I collide into you. The cherry on the cake for this maddening moment? That small, appreciative wave of thanks. Don’t delude yourself; I wasn’t being kind, I just chose to survive another day.

© 2016 – VIDA Magazine – Amy Webb